Riding to your salvation

As I sat listening to a man gargle the first few bars of 'Land of Hope and Glory', I pondered the terrible state of world affairs.
It seems as if, whenever I stop blogging, terrible things happen. Now, this is not to say that I have some kind of influence over the inherent state of the universe, that would be arrogant, but since I've been 'off line', the whole world has caught trout flu.
I thought it was bad enough when the WHO started banging on about the Narwal crisis (thats the organisation, not Roger Daltrey and his crew) that was threatening to take over the world, but now apparently some monkey mated with a gorilla near a river and then sneezed on a passing rabbit, who was terribly late for his checkup, then his wife went for a smear test at Doctor Harold Fishman's and was mis-diagnosed with carp-al tunnel syndrome.
And trout flu was born.
I don't wish to be distasteful but the idea of putting blancmange with pineapple and ostrich gravy, just really doesn't appeal to me, and couldn't help but be said.
I am writing poorly, and I am tired, I will finish this at a better time.

Now seems to be a better time, especially considering that I probably should be working, which is when the best stuff always gets done.
Now, I was going to post a link to a website which I just found about swine flu, but I've decided that I don't want to post links and that seen as I'm not responsible for the comedy therein, I'm not going to let some other money-grabbing-pig-stabbing-flu-carrying-prole take the credit.

There, thats better.

So, back to the point at hand which is the topical logic problem I've been developing. And for those of you nay-sayers whoare guffawing at the idea that I can use logic; suck on this:



--> suck here <--



Those others who are interested in my topical logic puzzle, read on.

'I have three pigs, named Winnie the Pig, Pigbo and Pig De Burgh. Each has been infected over the last week with swine flu. During this time I had a visit from four friends, Mavis, Beavis, Doris and Isis.
The possibility that all four were infected is high. Judging by their current locations, which will be provided, what is the likely number of people inhabited with swine flu?
Mavis is now in Chepstow visiting her elderly niece, Beavis has returned to Scotland where he lives on a loch with a imaginary beard, Doris is stood next to you and Isis has gone back in time to Egypt, which was her starting point anyway.'

The answer will follow at the end of this entry.

Recently the labyrinth has proved stressful and more than a little conducive to mental breakdowns, the last 7 of the 3 people who worked here all went on to have mental health issues. By which I mean they contracted malaria or something and a too young doctor diagnosed with one of the following variations:

'Dude, that is totally sick and not in a good way.'
'Mental illness home slice.'
'Hombre, you done protracted a deadly killer bug thing, ride on!'

Well, now that I'm done, you can have the answer to the logic puzzle.

To recap, the question was 'What is the likely number of people infected by swine flu?

The Answer:

None, I lied about owning pigs.


End.